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Thursday, March 24, 2005
Extreme Makeover: Southside Edition

I could have done a standard season preview. In fact, I started one, but I just couldn't bring myself to finish it. It wouldn't be original, or anything new to you. So in the interest of providing a preview that is both new and original, I present to you...



Fade in.

Hello Chicago! Ty Pennington here. I heard that you guys needed some help.

***Background info montage***

We've got a really special challenge for us this week. The Chicago White Sox are a major league baseball team that has been overshadowed in it's own town, hasn't won a division title in 4 years, hasn't won a post-season series in over 87 years, and is infamous for having thrown the 1919 World Series.

We're here to change all of that. Let's go surprise the team.

***Into megaphone*** Hey, WHITE SOX!!! Com'on out here!!

[KW]: Wha..What are you doing here?

[Ty]: Some of your fans wrote in to us. They told us about your long history of second place finishes; the World Series drought, the players strike that took away "your year." We've heard it all. But we're here to change all that.

[KW]: I've been working on it. I've just been flying under the radar.

[TY]: I heard about you ejoying "flying under the radar" so I talked to my friends in the Navy and got you special permission to spend the off-season with the Blue Angels.

[JR]: Is this gonna cost us any money?

[Ty]: No, We've got it all taken care of.

[KW]: But I've got it under control.

[JR]: (whispers to KW) Be quiet. I've seen this show before. You get all kinds of free stuff, and we can sell it off later for a profit.

[KW]: OK, but you guys gotta call me and keep me updated... And see if Carl Everett is available.

[JR]: He's already on the team, Kenny.

[Ty]: OK guys, we've got a limo waiting to take you off to meet the Blue Angels.

***Commercial Break***